she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
