there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Randomize
