WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Randomize
