i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Randomize