I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
Randomize
