Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize
