im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
