i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
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