Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
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