Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
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