we have officially lost it.
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
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