you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Randomize
