i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
Randomize
