omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
