Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Randomize