he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
Randomize
