OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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