i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
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