do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
