Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
Randomize
