if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Randomize
