Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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