She's JV to your varsity
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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