It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
I checked into jail on foursquare
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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