discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
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