a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Randomize