A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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