hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Drunk is not a location!
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Randomize
