she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
i out mim tonsoeep
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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