There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
