I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
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