I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
