She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
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