there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Randomize
