theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
lol hangovers are for mortals.
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