is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
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