I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
accomplished twins. life is a go
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize
