She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
no you cant smoke seaweed
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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