I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
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