Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
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