tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
