Can Purell be used as lube?
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Randomize
