i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Can Purell be used as lube?
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
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