it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
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