Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize
