end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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