i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
I wear drunk well.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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