Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
Randomize
