if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
Randomize
