I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
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