You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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